A Message From Ben
Six months after the loss of my boy to suicide, I was sitting at my computer journaling and checking my emails. Conscious communication with Benjamin had become less frequent over the course of time. I myself was going through a process of letting go and acceptance of our seeming separateness. I knew in my heart that he was still with me and trusted that authentic communication would happen in alignment with divine timing. The less I tried to control it, the more open I seemed to be. I was moving on in my life and bringing a powerful message to those around me to give focus and meaning to my loss in the here and now.
I was more and more filled with awe, gratitude and complete joy when those moments of absolute wonder presented themselves to me. As I was sitting there at my computer, I suddenly heard Ben’s voice in my head. He said, “Mom, write this down!” and I began to type. The following message came through me as though I was a stenographer in a courtroom. There was no thought involved. I just typed. Here’s what he had to say:
Do not fear
For I am here, I am here
Listen for my voice through the stillness of your heart
Come away from the noise of your surroundings
I am always with you
You are always with me
I remember now
I finally remember now
You can remember too!
You don’t have to leave your body to remember
I got frustrated
I forgot who I was
We all did
You all do
You can remember through me
You can remember through Christ
You can remember by going inside of yourself
I didn’t want to go inside
I was mesmerized by the outside voices
I saw no future for myself
I was torn from the outside in
You can be pieced together from the inside out
Go inside and get calm
Your world will change
You can change it
Change your mind
You will change your life
I see that now
I am still with you
I will always be with you
I love you
As you can imagine, I felt completely awe struck as these words of wisdom came through. Was it truly Benjamin’s voice, or was there another force working through him? I cannot know the answers to these questions and truthfully I do not need too! I am not attached to knowing. I am just grateful to have received such a beautiful and loving message.
Two hours later, I decided to share this message with my son Michael and his best friend, Chris. They were sitting at my kitchen table making tie dye t-shirts for their band. I placed the message in front of them on the kitchen table. They began to read. I was standing over Michael’s shoulder when suddenly, out of thin air, a single droplet of water landed on the paper. You could literally hear the tiny splat of the water when it hit the parchment. We were at first stunned, momentarily paralyzed and then curious. Chris began to search the tiffany lamp on the ceiling above the table for any signs of leakage from above. There was nothing there. As we examined the paper itself, we realized this tiny messenger from the other side of the veil had landed right next to the line that stated “you don’t have to leave your body to remember.”
Michael was reading that very line when the water fell. Had Michael, and the two of us blessed to be in the room at the same time, just received a tear from heaven, a tear from his brother, a message of hope for those of us left behind. The teardrop left a stain on the page where it fell.
The following day, I heard another voice! I said, "is that you, Benjamin?" to which the reply was, "No, this ist he Archangel Metatron!"
A Channel for Metatron
Within minutes after my son Benjamin left this planet, I began to receive communication from him. It started as conversations that I would have with my son. The voice was his, the mannerisms and inflections of these conversations were imbued with his personality and character. It wasn’t long before I started to feel a bigger presence. Almost, as though Ben was a catalyst or channel for something else. This has been a gradual process. As I have said before, I have know I idea how any of this works, my only role is to transcribe what I receive and share it with others. I have been told that Benjamin was encoded with the DNA, essence and beingness of the Archangel Metatron. Through my love for Benjamin and my deep and abiding faith in a greater vision and hope for the world and our future, I have been chosen to be the messenger for this energy to come through me as I move through the loss of my son and move forward to be the change I wish to see in the world.
As Metatron comes through me on this day, his message is as follows:
It is time to follow your heart, from the center outward. You have been looking outside yourselves for your answers. The answers are not out there. The outside is a mere reflection of that which you have projected and thereby created. This is not news to many of you. However, from our vantage point, and I speak for all the Archangels, guides and angels above, we are still seeing a huge energetic of backwardness to your process of projection from the inside out. It is my role to see the big picture and hold the space for a greater vision to manifest. So much of what you are creating in your world, even from those who are doing the WORK as you call it on your planet, are still looking from the outside in. We are calling to you in every moment, to seek the peace of God within yourselves. It is time to look inside in every moment before you speak, think, project, create, act or move forward in any way. Many of the channels in your world have brought through tremendous tools and awareness for you to continue to grow toward the light. The energies of the crystal, rainbow and indigo children are being felt at the ground level now. These children are here to be the change that you all seek to see. You must hand the torch over to them and trust in what they know. They have yet to be tainted by the bigger world view. There is a new color showing up in many of your meditations. The color is MAGENTA. This color is the mix of heaven (Crown-purple) and Earth (Root-red). This is the bridge and the creation of heaven and earth coming together to allow for peace, love and forgiveness to reign on your planet. The more you can focus your energies, visualizations and meditations on this color, from the inside of your mind, heart, body and soul, projected up and down through your chakra systems, the more you will bridge the gap between your world and mine. Direct, instruct, allow this beautiful color of magenta to permeate, first your heart center, and then your entire being. Fill every cell of your body with this brilliance and you will be filled with the grace you seek. We are coming together to create major ascension and for us descension. We are to meet in the middle so to speak. You see, spirit is wanting to have the experience of being in body and yet having all the benefits of not. This is an experiment that has been working itself to fruition for millennia. We are all in this together, for let us not forget this simple truth, we are ONE. There are many, many benefits to your world. Spirit loves the experience of creation in physical form. This project has gone array for many, many, many lifetimes due to the need to control the physical world by ego. It is time to trust in the bigger picture and lift yourselves up beyond that of the ego mind and see all that you are meant to be. There is so much for you here. There is so much for all of us to experience in the presence of love as our central focus. As you bridge the Christ Light (Violet) of heaven and the earth light of the mother (red) you will be the bridge for great change on your planet. This is the connection of mother and father igniting the heart of their children to live in peace in harmony as has and will always be our greatest wish for you. This transmission is essential for the survival of your planet and this ascension. With all of my love and abiding faith in the highest vision and manifestation for all, I leave you with the blessings of spirit . . . Archangel Metatron!
Judy Giovangelo is the founder of Ben Speaks Louder Than Words, www.benspeaks.org a non-profit organization born through the tragic and unexpected loss of her son Benjamin to suicide in 2009 after a life time of suffering with the stigma of mental illness and taking his own life.
Judy is a Master Intuitive, speaker, teacher, healer and coach. She channels her son Benjamin who passed to spirit through suicide on 4/16/2009. Judy has been working with sensitive, intuitive, empathic and creative children for many, many years teaching them to love themselves for who they are through the practices of yoga, guided imagery and mindfulness and the expressive arts. To contact Judy for private work or to become involved in the Ben Speaks mission to work to discover and provide access to Expressive & Healing Art Resources to youth, families and communities. Please call: 617-592-6715. For more info about Ben Speaks go to www.benspeaks.org